Maybe it's better off blank?

This is my blog you will say. The words and thoughts from to being inside my head. The things I do not say a daily basis. From how much I don't really talk when I'm outside. Here are my session's of how things go on a daily basis and how I feel from time to time.

September 6, 2013 at 3:57am
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Reblogged from albotas
albotas:

Metalocalypse Seasons 1-4 DVDs On Sale on Amazon
Good old Amazon is having a great deal on Metalocalypse DVDs. Each season DVD is $10, including seasons 1-4. Seasons 1-3 usually run for $30 each, with 4 being at $20, so this is a pretty good deal you’re saving with. Act on that now if you want to bring home some Dethklok metal for your home entertainment.
Buy it:Metalocalypse Season 1Metalocalypse Season 2Metalocalypse Season 3Metalocalypse Season 4

I want…..

albotas:

Metalocalypse Seasons 1-4 DVDs On Sale on Amazon

Good old Amazon is having a great deal on Metalocalypse DVDs. Each season DVD is $10, including seasons 1-4. Seasons 1-3 usually run for $30 each, with 4 being at $20, so this is a pretty good deal you’re saving with. Act on that now if you want to bring home some Dethklok metal for your home entertainment.

Buy it:
Metalocalypse Season 1
Metalocalypse Season 2
Metalocalypse Season 3
Metalocalypse Season 4

I want…..

May 14, 2013 at 7:23pm
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I have not felt this numb but it’s not cold..

I don’t really wanna think and it’s not that I cannot. But it’s because since lately with everything happening the way it has been. I feel like I know what I am going to do but then I feel like I don’t. Everyone is wanting to help me. I’m trying but I feel so lost just standing here. I wanna laugh, I wanna cry, I want to feel something! A second bike of mine was stolen, I have to find a place to live by the end of this month, and my birthday is tomorrow. Something I can think of is what kind of day will it be? Will I tear away at the seam’s of smiling face’s or will I explode from overflowing emotion with a buildup of an atom bomb. I wanna think that it’s going to be ok and it will be I know it will be. I have a lot of good people looking out for me. I will always have my music to. Just breathe feel the flow and know that the turnout is going to go well. This is just me overreacting. Stop looking back and see more forward I think maybe along the way I lost touch of what it is I stand for. Let’s just face one thing at a time. The sun is still shining. I should try to smile more…

May 12, 2013 at 3:53pm
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Don’t think and just keep walking away.

Maybe it was to much. To straight forward? I have no idea at this point. The time really passes by when you don’t notice it. As well as when you sit there and think about nothing. Am I in motion then why am I not falling? That sounds silly haha. I have been feeling sad I’ll let the truth out. I have not really been doing much. Isn’t it bad enough when your friends think it’s recommended you go hang out with your friends. The more I look at it the more I see what has happened to me. I’m falling back into old ways again… Although it dose help me also see I have fallen out of touch with many of my friends. some of the days now have been gloomy. What kills me is the right thing of my conscience saying “Hey jay why don’t we get you up brush our self off and try again? What do ya say?” Me: meh…. I feel like a walking disaster on days like these. I fall in and out I’m on a roller coaster then I’m topsy turvy. I think somewhere I just need to sit down and level with myself. I think I’m ok and I feel alright. But why is that I have these shift’s in my emotions from time to time. Make’s me feel crazy. I don’t know so I’ll just end it here.

P.S. Happy mothers day!

May 10, 2013 at 8:42pm
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Can I be strong?

The days are familiar as the suns starts to shine just a little more every day. Summer is coming and all those for the warmer weather are walking more. Being out side has been such an escape from everything. Taking bike ride’s at night again has been so invigorating. I have forgot how it felt to be under the starts but feeling the rush of going faster with the cool air just blowing against my skin. Also I started taking frequent walks with one of my roommate’s to get in better shape. Well as for my absence it gose with the days that have passed since my last few entry’s. Between work and trying to get some things in order that are of the most important. It’s been somewhat hectic here and there. Although with lately things have slowed down which is nice. I have given up to much time on not writing for as long it has been. I don’t even remember. I can say this with just a phone call it can change a lot. But with what happened was good. I didn’t take a second look at it. But I have been keeping to myself more then usual ately. My emotions were running high the other day. All because I got stuck in my head with my thoughts thankfully I didn’t have a breakdown at work that time. Getting older it seems that thoughts are like a trap and memories become a prison.  It’s not that there all bad but when your emotional from time to time it’s seem hard to grasp on to something for to long before it starts to get to you. Maybe that’s just me but I don’t wanna think like that. Complications rise but sometimes all you can do is always look out for yourself in the end. It seems more like that lately. I”m unsure how I’m going to go about things but only time will tell in this case. Amongst other things everything is in its right place for now. It’s been a while since I’ve been gone but maybe I am back now. We’ll see if I can continue this steady pace of blogging and working of writing some songs as well as getting to my journal every once in a while. Something new I had midnight * my guitar * brought back from the dead just kidding. It just needed some tuning and a little tlc. I’ve been playing and getting better as well as playing on my acoustic but not as much my electric. Maybe at some point I’ll start to learn how to play songs and chords until then I’m just running blind. “All that shimmers seems to fade away…again”- Fuel-shimmer.

P.S. Thank you I missed ya.

May 9, 2013 at 2:17am
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There is nothing to say.

Something has come my way. It was on a day of many that I was caught off guard.

February 8, 2013 at 8:10pm
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Nonesense you’ll never call back

As it seems I’m feeling lonely as I do although wit the company of three roomate’s the ideas of a relationship and sharing that special feeling always arise and creep up on you eventually. I find myself listing to sad song’s and sitting in my room in my lonesome. But I could not complain if I’m not doing something about it haha. That would make me a hypocrite but that’s something we cannot always escape sometimes you know? It’s something special when I get that call or text. Somehow though all our attempt’s in trying to see each other fail. I wonder if sometimes this is being stringed along. I would not want it to be at least. We’ve both walked away many times but have always come back. Although could this be it are we burnt out on our hope. I’m not sure anyways the day was rather slow the day has just gone by like the few text’s of short conversations between friends. Offer’s to escape this prison of  place. Talk’s about maybe going back to live better days. But we sit here knowing that we are who we are now and that there is no going back and what once was is now gone. So what dose that make us now we think? No more thinking now not then or not for a while at least. That’s my thought’s right now.  How we have been going on about things is all now mystery to me and everyone has got something on there mind to say. For me being the quiet guy sometimes I feel like chopped liver. But I never recall when I’m speaking my opinion half the time haha. these days I just want to get by and get through the ideas of me being on my own one day weather they be soon or later in the future I don’t wanna try and get caught up in the jumble of things I am just going to try and keep living my life as freely as possible.So ” who’s going to watch you die? “-death cab for cute.

January 15, 2013 at 2:15am
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Now adjusted for your eye’s only

I’ve been a bit absent on my post’s more like procrastination getting the best of me really. That or I have just decided to be really lazy. Well I got home from work and just crashed got something of a warm and direct welcome when I got home to a hug then from another mate a offer of coming in early to work today. Now I’m sitting here typing away wondering why I’m not in bed sleeping having to be up at eight am then working until 11 pm oi something of a much to long shift I hope they don’t have me work but it is what it is I guess. I would not hope that cruel fate would take me to such things. Now I should not complain my hours are down and a few more is never bad. But am I the only one that just wants to work the times that are giving to them sometimes? Uh please forgive me it was just a long night going into another shift. I expected the usual busyness and running around but lately it’s been getting a little slower every once in a while. Today though was just on and off. Little rush then dead another little rush then dead again after a while of standing around I was trying to think of things to do with those of which I already got done. Well back to when I came home I helped myself to some food. Then I laid on my bed listening to a perfect circle’s “mer de noms.” Losing myself in the song of the hollow and 3 libras as well as the whole album itself. Now I sit here typing away with static X’s “wisconsin death trip” going off in the background. Progressive and keeping me moving I have not fallen asleep yet. But this is where I sign to you my fellow follower’s which are not but maybe more in the future who knows only the time will ever tell.

December 20, 2012 at 10:19pm
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Just another day or is it the last?

In the end how we all wake up tomorrow will be our own I just wanted to say no matter what happens tomorrow I love you all ^_^

December 17, 2012 at 12:51am
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Can you guess where I work? haha

Can you guess where I work? haha

12:02am
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For the holidays this is what I have to say?

It’s been odd lately with the whole not seeing my dad on and off when I do it being a total shock of surprise. I’m not how sure how to cope with it all. I just feel on edge and with all the walking on me that’s been happening. It’s just been driving me under as I would not mind find a dark place and just sitting there. Then again a drink by the Christmas tree was alright. Days around the holidays just make me oddly emotional. So glass of wine anyone we’ll keep it classy.